Fun club

My ex-girlfriend sent me an sms: "You can delete my number". I answered: "Who is it?"

My wife likes to talk to me after having sex. Although three years have passed since our divorce, she still calls me after that.

Wedding traditions must be changed. You should throw a single man into the crowd instead of the bunch of flowers.

A record from girl's diary:

- I have met a man of my dream! God, I have so bad dreams!

- Darling, which would you like to receive on the 8th of March: SMS or MMS?

In a court:

- Do you know what you can get for false swearing?

- Yes, they promised a BMW.

A sleeping child is not only "cute" but also "at last".

Life is movement! So, stir your foot when you lie on the sofa!

A wife talks to her husband:

- Do you remember that tomorrow is my mother's birthday?

- Why? Every year all the same!!!

- Do you trust dollar and euro?

- Yes, but they don't trust me!